Kit10Phish Explains It All: RomComs Influence Real Life Behavior [10]

There was a lot of information packed into this post:

https://kit10phish.wordpress.com/?s=Problematic+RomCom&submit=Search

So I'm going to do a series to split it up into smaller chunks.

No or Downplayed Consequences in Films Can Lead to High Tolerance for Abusive Behavior

Consider You’ve Got Mail, where a local bookshop owner gets run out of business — but ultimately winds up with the businessman whose chain bookstore replaced her own. Or Never Been Kissed, when a shy newspaper reporter poses as a student to get a second chance at high school, but falls in love with the English teacher who thinks she is just one of his students. Or one of my personal favorites, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, in which a big-city magazine editor gets caught up in a “love competition” with the publication’s advertising executive, who is secretly in on the bet.

Some of these plot points are based on fireable offenses on the part of the men. (It’s never okay to date your student, even if it turns out she’s of age.) Some of these situations are just plain rude. (Would you seriously consider a relationship with the man who ran you out of business?) And you’ll notice that these relationships are not equal. Whether through implied financial success (advertising or business executive), authority (English teacher to someone thought to be a student), or both, men carry the upper hand. It’s sometimes subtle, but it’s there.

Watching men fight for the women they love in every romantic movie has possibly made women develop this false reality of romance.

Growing up with the now often-parodied teen flicks of the 90s and early 2000s, I can attest to the fact that the movies I watched when I was younger played a huge role in the misconceptions that I and so many of my peers had when it came to relationships. If a guy treats you poorly, he likes you. If you argue a lot with another person, it means you have chemistry. And if all else fails, you’ll probably just wind up with your best friend anyway.

Unrealistic Expectations Impact Real Life

Romantic comedies have created a somewhat unrealistic scenario: a boy will knock at our door with flowers, gifts, and a homemade CD with all our favorite songs including the entire soundtrack of La La Land. This genre of movies might have affected our relationships without even knowing it. The plot lines and exaggerated endings of romantic comedies build a standard in our heads that real life relationships struggle to meet. It’s normal to fall out of love, find yourself, and move on, but romantic comedies have equated this concept with failure.

Researchers believe that the influence of Hollywood films is implanting a sense of “perfect” relationship within society and providing unrealistic expectations about romance. A team at Heriot Watt University in Edinburgh studied the top 40 box office films released between 1995 and 2005, to establish common themes. The team produced a study in 2008. They asked hundreds of people to fill out a questionnaire to describe their beliefs and expectations when it came to relationships. The results showed that the fans of films such as You’ve Got Mail, The Wedding Planner, and While You Were Sleeping, frequently fail to communicate with their partners effectively. Many of them held the view that “if someone is meant for you, then they should know what you want without you needing to tell them.” Dr. Bjarne Holmes, a psychologist who led the research, told that Marriage counselor’s often meet with these people that have this mindset and also believe that sex should always be perfect. The team drew conclusions from the studying suggesting that the popular media plays a role in putting these ideas in women minds.

Dr. Holmes expressed, “People feel like if their relationships are not like a Hollywood film, then it is not any good. Time and energy needs to be invested for it to work.”

Saturday, April 26, 2025

RomComs Influence Real Life Behavior [10]

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