There was a lot of information packed into this post:
https://kit10phish.wordpress.com/?s=Problematic+RomCom&submit=Search
So I'm going to do a series to split it up into smaller chunks.
Conclusion:
Valentine's Day is just a real life example of romcoms playing out. In the same way the porn industry might dictate a man's expectations in bed (choking, rape fantasy, the money shot) [Sidenote: I'm not here to kink-shame, but at the same time "see yer therapist" as Joey from 'I Think Not' podcast would say]. Romcoms influence what women desire and expect on the day of romance.
Exclusion of diverse stories, characters, and perspectives
Stereotypical feminine boxes
Male power domination
Males taking the lead and making unrealistic gestures in relationships
very strict definition of a happy ending, and failure if falling short of that
The comforting feeling of sitting down to watch a romantic tear-jerker is something I, and I’m sure plenty of others, hold dear. But it’s time to be aware. A closer look at the problematic themes in “chick flicks” reveals the consistent trend in how women in relationships are presented under Hollywood’s spotlight, and it is not just the case for Bridget or Andy. It’s persistent in many mainstream rom-coms such as Pretty Woman, Runaway Bride, 27 Dresses, etc. Let’s stop letting Hollywood’s glam and dreamy romance dictate our mindsets and remember that anyone can be a protagonist.
But all too often, pop culture dictates that we must choose, and that “career” is the wrong choice. Society needs to remember that these options are not mutually exclusive, and that we can have both.
While it’s easier to transition away from this genre, it’s harder to rewire an internal bias or learned behavior. So while we can’t change the past, we can make a conscious effort to notice some of the lingering after-effects that may result from years of exposure to this rom-com genre.
Sources:
https://www.thealinemag.com/entertainment-socialmedia/the-toxic-reality-of-rom-coms
https://womensmediacenter.com/fbomb/the-problem-with-rom-coms
https://movieweb.com/romantic-comedies-popular-why/
https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/gallery/highest-grossing-romantic-comedies-419302/10-confessions-of-a-shopahloic-108333222/
https://www.34st.com/article/2021/02/romantic-comedy-diversity-bipoc-hollywood-representation
https://bouqs.com/blog/valentines-day-statistics-survey
https://business.yougov.com/content/45117-how-will-americans-spend-valentines
https://today.yougov.com/entertainment/articles/45146-americans-relationship-romantic-comedies-poll
https://www.movieguide.org/news-articles/who-goes-to-the-movies-4.html
https://www.jonathanwstokes.com/blog/2015/04/18/are-romantic-comedies-profitable
https://skoobywatchesmovies.com/recent-movie-news/2019/3/16/rom-com-bracket-vote-on-the-sweet-16-kj8bk-bg7nl-87f6x
https://www.mindlabpro.com/blogs/nootropics/neuroplasticity-rewire-your-brain-for-learning-memory-and-mood
https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fnins.2021.630829/full
https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-017-16592-y
https://www.vice.com/en/article/3kxzpv/rom-com-queer-viewer
https://www.autostraddle.com/queering-the-canon-where-are-all-the-trans-rom-coms
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