Saturday, December 6, 2025

Wi$hLi$t is a Salute to Bearding & Lavender Marriages

 


I have a theory that Wi$hli$t is not actually hoping people get what they want in an earnest way. I think it’s a covert diss track. And I think Taylor is telling us these people secretly get what they want due to bearding/PR relationships drawing public attention. 



They want that yacht life under chopper blades



This line could apply to many people, many, many people! But I was trying to think who Taylor might sing about in a sneering way and came up with the KarJenners.






They want those bright lights and Balenci shades







And a fat ass with a baby face



This was the line that tipped me off that Taylor isn’t just wishing people well, here. This line is negative and shows contradictions. 









They want it all


We all know the KarJenners “want it all” and aren’t above manufacturing drama, relationships,

scandals for PR. How many of the following Kim Kardashian relationships were legitimate?

None to some. Now, how many were not mined, exaggerated, played up for publicity? NONE.

And there is a decided pattern of the romance eclipsing scandal. Guy is getting bad press?

“Date” Kim. Family needs to hide something? Push out a coupling to take the attention.




Ray J 2005-2006







Nick Lachey 2006


His split with Jessica Simpson showed him in a negative light–enter a Kim K relationship 6mo later.




Christiano Ronaldo 2010


He had gay murmurings. Enter Kim K and her television show.




Gabriel Aubry 2010


The articles coming out after his split from Halle Berry were negative and emasculating. Enter Kim K. For a few weeks.






Kris Humphries 2010-2011


More gay rumors. Enter Kim K. Seeing a pattern?





Pete Davidson 2021-2022


We have the KimYe split, and a lot of Kanye issues. 


We have a crowd crush incident at a boyfriend’s show, with evidence of self-preoccupation from several in the fam.


We have private jet environmental travesty.


We have an inconvenient birth.


This time the PR boyfriend is helping the KarJenners avoid bad press.

And getting attention on his budding career.





O’Dell Beckham 2023


A waning career, people pushing retirement, and a player thinking of his legacy.

What better to distract against worsening career stats than a Kim K relationship?







I don’t know who the next section is specifically for, but in general, people trying to make it in

Hollywood have to have a persona that the public, press, and industry supports.

They might beard or show-mance to hide perceived unpleasant things, and gain clout.


They want that complex female character

They want that critical smash Palme d'Or

And an Oscar on their bathroom floor




I also wondered if this section is for Taylor and Travis.

Taylor wants to get into directing, and Travis wants to be an actor.

It’s possible their relationship is maximizing their exposure,

creating the narrative they want, or hiding something controversial

(the gay of it all).


They want it all


And they should have what they want

They deserve what they want

Hope they get what they want


I just want you

Have a couple kids, got the whole block looking like you


I think a lot of people are confused by the whole block looking like someone. Like, how many kids would you have to have before the whole block is related? Will Taylor literally have 10 kids as she says in that one early song?! I think one way that would explain it is the Ku$hners. Both brothers have had gay allegations. Both have been accused of lavender marriages. Both have kids–3 per brother. Annnnnddd, at least one house that each brother owns (bc of course both bros own several properties) is in close proximity to the other brother. 

That’s 6 Ku$hner children on one “block” for those keeping count.




We tell the world to leave us the fuck alone, and they do


Everyone knows famous women expire after wedding, child, and/or the age of 30.


Prior to that women have to deal with constant speculation about who they’re dating. When they will marry. Lavender Haze, you know the rest. BUT if that woman does settle in the public’s mind–they can know privacy and peace. Give them what they want, “them” being the audience, media, industry– and the couple can be more free of scrutiny to actually live authentically behind the scenes.


Wow, got me dreaming 'bout a driveway with a basketball hoop


Who has basketball connections??? Ex-best friend, Karlie Kloss.








Boss up, settle down, got a wish list (Wish list)



Boss up being business-centric. Settle down is the means to do the business how YOU want,

instead of in a reactionary way. These example couples from each stanza

beard/show-mance/lavender marry specifically to conduct business and their

personal lives on their own terms.

Settle down is a cover that allows them to take control of the situation.


And probably unrelated– another song called ‘Boss Up’ that talks about

leaving a deadbeat (or THE MAN) and making your own money on your own terms:





I just want you


They want that freedom, living off the grid


Those 2 Ku$ner houses in close proximity are of course in Florrrida!!!




They want those three dogs that they call their kids



Or, ya know, dyed the dog in key lime green, when historical accuracy would say dog…



And that good surf, no hypocrites




Obviously, the hypocrites in question (well, a few of them):




They want it all


They want a contract with Real Madrid


This line is the reason I didn’t publish this theory the week of the album drop. Because you better believe I caught “best friend who I think is hot” and “got the whole block looking like you” right away.

This one was tough for me, as I don’t know anything about soccer/futball other than “scarves up!” for Seattle Sounders. 

At first I thought maybe this was about Po$h $pice and David Beckham, mostly because that’s the only player I know by name. And he’s, mmmmm,  metrosexual to closeted. And it does seem like their relationship started out of nowhere, received maximum press, and helped both their images. 

I guess Beckham played for Real Madrid, but I’m not sure his Po$h marriage timeline preceded that… 


What I did see was the club seemed awfully anti-LGBTQ

(at least per my surface level research).


But when I was looking into it I found another candidate for Taylor’s line:

Here’s someone who’s “Twitter was hacked” (sure, Jan) with the words:




“I hope you respect me: I’m gay.” 

And he played for Real Madrid.




Prior to this announcement:


Departing Real Madrid captain and goalkeeper Iker Casillas

was forced out by club president Florentino Perez

and is too good to play for a "third-tier" side like Porto,

according to his parents.


Real announced on Saturday that Casillas was leaving

after 16 seasons in the first team to join the Portuguese

club, and his exit is widely expected to prompt the arrival

of David De Gea from Manchester United.


Real published a glowing homage to Casillas on their

website, calling him "the greatest goalkeeper in the

history of the club and in the history of Spanish football"

as well as "a symbol of the best in our history".


However, in an interview with Spanish daily El Mundo,

Casillas's parents Jose Luis and Mari Carmen said their

son had been badly treated by Perez since he returned

for a second stint as president in 2009. Casillas had

been the victim of an orchestrated campaign of

"vilification" in recent years which eventually prompted

his decision to quit, they added… Mari Carmen added

Casillas was upset about a financial dispute with Real

which prompted the player to take legal action against

the club in 2009.


Real did not immediately respond to a request for comment.


"Iker has put up with a great deal, he has suffered

psychological pressure and they treated him differently t

o other players," Mari Carmen told El Mundo.

"I have watched him suffer for many years. It is

Florentino who is pushing him out because he wanted

to end his career at Real Madrid."




Bad time with team management in 2009. 

Big, splashy straight relationship 2010.




I’m saying that maybe having a marriage to a lady allowed tensions

(Speculation:  Over his homosexuality, in part?) with his club to settle down.




They want that spring break that was fuckin' lit


This could be anyone, but I couldn’t find a super-duper likely

candidate for this line. Still, it fits with the theme of wanting

to have private debaucherous fun, but a wholesome positive

celebrity image.


Just for the sake of a more tangible example–Back to the KarJenners:





And then that video taken off the internet

They want it all


And they should have what they want

They deserve what they want

I hope they get what they want


I just want you (You, you, yeah)


Now, Taylor could be using “you” again to distinguish her private muse. 


Or she could be writing from Karlie’s perspective. 


I mean, Kim K & family have also dated a few BB players, I think. Could be from one of their perspectives.


The point is, the bearding/lavender marriages give these people better press, more privacy behind the scene since fans/media are satiated by the narrative, thus more control over their careers and lives.


Have a couple kids, got the whole block looking like you

We tell the world to leave us the fuck alone, and they do

Wow, got me dreaming 'bout a driveway with a basketball hoop

Boss up, settle down, got a wish list (Wish list)


I made wishes on all of the stars


https://taylorswiftandx.tumblr.com/post/177222367290/taylor-swift-and-stars




Please, God, bring me a best friend who I think is hot

I thought I had it right once, twice, but I did not (I did not)


once:


twice:


You caught me off my guard

I hope I get what I want (Get what I want)

'Cause I know what I want


I just want you, baby

Have a couple kids, got the whole block looking like you (Got 'em looking like you)

We tell the world to leave us the fuck alone, and they do

Wow, got me dreaming 'bout a driveway with a basketball hoop

Boss up, settle down, got a wish list (Wish list)


I just want you

And we could have a couple kids, got the whole block looking like you (You)

We tell the world to leave us the fuck alone, and they do (Yeah)

Wow, and now you got me dreaming 'bout a driveway with a basketball hoop

Boss up, settle down, got a wish list (Wish list)

I just want you


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