Candy Gram Symptoms- Low Self Esteem [11A]

Rejection feels lousy.

“Feeling excluded, rejected, or left out also hits on our sense of self-worth, which we develop through our interpersonal relationships with others,” says psychologist Holly Schiff, out of Greenwich, Connecticut (4).

I’ve tried to get him to see a counsellor, but it’s hard for him to open up and identify his feelings and furthermore express it. He feels a lot of shame being rejected and when you talk about silent bullying or exclusion, he will snap at you and say “that’s not me!” He doesn’t want to feel like something is wrong with him with his mild intellectual disability. He told me that he doesn’t know how much more of this he can take. He also doesn’t want to join any kind of social skills workshop to help him or any social groups. It’s literally soul torture to watch someone you love be rejected like this. I really don’t know how to help him anymore because what I’m suggesting, such as a social group, he won’t do. I’m considering taking him out of school because of it.

According to research, feeling left out may cause you to shift toward an avoidance, or prevention-oriented, thought process. This may make you more aware of your behaviors and interactions and may cause you to seek to refine some of your social habits (4).

Sources:

(1) https://carolinemaguireauthor.com/help-a-kid-who-is-being-ostracized-feeling-left-out/

(2) https://www.responsiveclassroom.org/how-to-talk-with-parents-about-cliques-and-exclusion/

(3) https://afineparent.com/positive-parenting-faq/social-exclusion.html

(4) https://psychcentral.com/health/why-feeling-left-stings-and-healthy-ways-to-cope#why-it-bothers-you

(5) https://workbravely.com/blog/diversity-equity-inclusion/when-you-feel-excluded-at-work-speaking-up-bravely/

(6) https://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/04/rejection

(7) https://gsdrc.org/topic-guides/social-exclusion/causes/exclusion-based-on-social-status-or-identity/

(8) https://www.mcleanhospital.org/essential/bullying-kids-teens

(9) https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2024.1368214/full

(10) https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22889163/

(11) https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0190740924000148

(12) https://files.eric.ed.gov/fulltext/EJ1184924.pdf

(13) https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6085085/

(14) (https://conversationstoremember.org/loneliness-and-isolation/#:~:text=Loneliness%2C%20on%20the%20other%20hand,of%20a%20hostile%20social%20environment.)

(15) https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022519321003581

(16) https://elifesciences.org/articles/78246

(17) https://educationdata.org/public-education-spending-statistics

(18) https://www.aaastateofplay.com/where-in-the-united-states-are-children-most-dependent-on-free-school-lunches/

(19) https://nces.ed.gov/fastfacts/display.asp?id=898