Sunday, June 22, 2025

Fear vs. Desire [Queer Lyrical Easter Eggs- Pride 21]

 Ivy

The song starts with a question:



How's one to know?




I'd meet you where the spirit meets the bones





I’ve gathered aside from calling back Treacherous with its skin and bone, Taylor is referencing religious stuff here. Easter, to be exact. Here’s what I found that makes me think that:






Basically, humans can’t be physically close with God bc they disobeyed in the garden and he blocked that off so we act right. The ways to get close are physical churchy places to gather and pray.


God, the creator of the universe, also chose to be a human being. BUT God cannot die, so he sent a proxy–Jesus—a being who is fully human and fully God—to die. Jesus chose to diminish himself beyond our comprehension—to temporarily forsake his existence amongst perfection in heaven to walk amongst brokenness. He lived a perfect life on earth and never sinned. 


Jesus was a willing sacrifice who, even though he submitted himself to death for our sake, was in total control. He chose to exist with those whom he loved, knowing full well that most would end up hating him and that they would brutally murder him. He felt every crack of the whip, every thorn piercing his scalp, and each nail through his hands and feet. He didn’t flip some holy switch to get above it all. He experienced this excruciating death as a fully human man. Jesus—who is God—dies. Fully, without a pulse, dead. He embraces crucifixion for the sins of the world and has his lifeless body laid in a sealed tomb. For three days, He lay in the tomb. 


But then something miraculous happened—something that He told us would happen—a scandalous act that has and will continue to ripple across humanity forever: He came back to life.


https://www.crossroads.net/media/articles/how-did-god-die



Taylor is comparing Easter and her perfect love with this person (Karlie?). In the same way Jesus was killed, outside forces killed Kaylor. But in the same way Jesus came back to life, Taylor and Karlie are going to meet to rekindle things.





In a faith forgotten land


But Taylor specifies though she’s referencing the resurrection, this love is not considered holy. It’s seen as deviant. “Faith Forgotten” is the title of a book that talks about religions:




To be exact, the book talks about religious sects that were suppressed by THE CHURCH.





OK, I won’t get super-into the gnostic stuff here, bc we’re trying to do a thing, but if you want to read more connections I did an earlier series on it:


https://kit10phish.wordpress.com/2023/05/02/taylor-swifts-gay-moments-evermore-ivy/




At any rate, this is some real Evermore stuff.






In from the snow





Your touch brought forth an incandescent glow



Taylor’s love had been repressed and Karlie awoke something in her. The queerness was the inner glow.




Tarnished but so grand


The love is stigmatized. Kaylor couldn’t just come out without a lot of career and social consequences. As a result of forces larger than their control, each individual was pressured to do things they aren’t proud of. Taylor was bearding with men which complicated the Kaylor relationship. She obfuscated, lied, and hid the true nature of their relationship. Karlie cheated on her longtime (whatever he is to her) and possibly played a part of the Masters Heist. But the love was just so perfect.




And the old widow goes to the stone every day

But I don't, I just sit here and wait

Grieving for the living


Taylor is still getting over the hurt and pain. Breakups suck, betrayal sucks worse. It’s as if Karlie is dead because she put a sea between herself and Taylor, but she’s also still throwing crumbs to the last remaining Kaylors. Taylor is in a bad place.




Oh, goddamn

My pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand

Taking mine, but it's been promised to another


Whenever Kaylor resurrect their love, Taylor feels bad. Karlie is cold from being outside the relationship in the snow. Karlie, is chilly/distant because she has a plan for her life and doesn’t want a mainstream sapphic love to ruin that. But Karlie is still willing to have a secret love affair with Taylor. And when Karlie gives Taylor the smallest gesture, extends her hand to her, brings Taylor in, holds Taylor’s hand–that alleviates Taylor’s pain. Karlie is in control of Taylor’s pain. When she’s in Taylor’s life Taylor feels better, but when Karlie runs away, Taylor feels horrible. Long term, Taylor feels awful when Karlie has turned away from the Kaylor relationship. But Taylor is also miserable when Karlie is in it, because it’s not the desired grand, exclusive love story, Taylor is just a side-chick and an affair partner. Taylor wants more, but Karlie is all-in on the Ku$hner vows (promised to another).





Oh, I can't

Stop you putting roots in my dreamland

My house of stone, your ivy grows

And now I'm covered in you



This sentiment is felt by both gals.



English ivy travels along the ground and also climbs up vertical supports such as tree trunks, fence posts, and walls. If its growth is unchecked, it can travel from one plant to another and bind the plants together. This ability sometimes has a symbolic meaning. 

Some versions of the medieval legend of Tristan and Isolde (or Iseult) refer to ivy's ability to bind. Tristan was a Cornish knight, and Isolde was an Irish princess. Tristan went to Ireland to claim Isolde as a bride for King Mark. Tristan and Isolde die and are buried in separate graves by King Mark so that even in death they cannot be together. However, an ivy vine (or another vine or a tree) grows out of each grave towards the other one. The ivy vines meet and twine around each other, forming a connection. 

In some versions of the legend, a rose bush grows out of Isolde's grave and a vine out of Tristan's. Even when the king cuts the twined plants, they regrow and reconnect.


https://owlcation.com/social-sciences/English-Ivy-Symbolism-Traditions-and-Mythology




It’s giving powerful men (Ku$hner, $cooter) keep Taylor and Karlie apart, but they spiritually are together anyway.





I wish to know

The fatal flaw that makes you long to be

Magnificently cursed



A flaw that will kill you. I think it could be sapphic attraction:


Magnificent?



She could mean to great degree:




But the way I hear the line, it’s as if it’s being contrasted. The magnificent is opposite of cursed. So what makes sense to me in this context is:




Magnificently cursed as in pleasurably cursed reminds me of the constant themes of both fear and attraction running through a lot of Taylor’s catalog:



Instead of living a peaceful life on the downlow, it’s as if Taylor wants to suffer. She is only happy if she and Karlie are exclusive. She’s toying with the idea of coming out, which also outs Karlie. Karlie wants things both ways. She wants the optics of a marriage to a man, and the Kaylor secret affair. She can’t understand why Taylor has all these doubts about her loyalty.





He's in the room

Your opal eyes are all I wish to see

He wants what's only yours


Karlie feels loyalty about the prior promise, but also conflicted because she loves Taylor back.  Karlie says, she too, looked forward to these stolen, sneaky moments. Karlie assures Taylor that her heart belongs to her, even if Jo$h is with her.   





Clover blooms in the fields


Clover  signifies something invasive and difficult to eliminate like Kaylor love.  It’s another way of talking about the metaphor of the golden tattoo.  Forever.  Clover spreads quickly, like the love affair that took Taylor by surprise and grabbed every piece of her in no time.  Clover puts down roots.  But it is considered a weed.  

Karlie put roots in Taylor’s dreamland (career goals that could be derailed by being out) and Taylor put roots in Karlie’s dreamland (her arranged marriage/bearding contract with a billionaire man). Neither can emotionally extricate herself, or each other from the situation. This beautiful love that so easily blooms is a weed to both parties’ life program.  It creates complications.




Spring breaks loose, the time is near

What would he do if he found us out?


Ivy is an escalation of the intrusiveness of clover.  Ivy blocks the sunlight. It chokes trees. Ivy is aggressively imposing.  Something is approaching that causes everyone involved to feel tension and act audaciously. The “time is near.”  This is a known  prearranged event on a date foreshadowed by spring.  Karlie feels torn by the love she would die to keep, and the urgency of her imminent premeditated engagement.





Crescent moon, coast is clear


The crescent speaks to the changing phases of the moon that show time has passed in this affair, it shows the affair must change with time, and the moon phase shows the end of this romance is imminent due to the upcoming event.  It ties to the changing seasons Taylor is already pointing out.  Changing heart and vacillating resolve are also perfect descriptors of the characters in this song.   





Spring breaks loose, but so does fear

He's gonna burn this house to the ground


Taylor says the future of this love affair–her fate is tied to what the guy will do.  She’s afraid to keep the Kaylor affair going. This man has a lot of power and money… It’s just one more barrier to their sapphic love.





How's one to know?

I'd live and die for moments that we stole

On begged and borrowed time

So tell me to run

Or dare to sit and watch what we'll become

And drink my husband's wine


Karlie says it’s Taylor who pushes her away, and tells her to run.  And Taylor’s hand is the chilly, distant one.  Karlie lived and died for their time together and is willing to dare to see what happens if her and Taylor stay together, drinking (Karlie’s husband/beard) Jo$h’s wine.




So yeah, it's a fire

It's a goddamn blaze in the dark

And you started it

You started it

So yeah, it's a war

It's the goddamn fight of my life

And you started it

You started it


Between the lure and commitment to the guy and the life he can provide, and the problems and complications constantly caused by bearding and closeting, Kaylor love seems doomed. It’s both of their faults, and neither of their faults. Taylor and Karlie had a strong love, but keeping it alive is a war.


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