Kit10Phish Explains It All: “I Got My Bangs Trimmed” [5. Confronting a Narcissist]

I asked ViKtim if she had confronted MiNarc about the incident and she said, "You know MiNarc" [of course using her actual name] meaning we all knew she would be unapproachable about it and would be indirect if pressed for details.

MiNarc was also very keen-witted and could probably concoct a plausible reason for the time-consuming visit to the hospital. It was MiNarc's job to be sagacious at work--she could easily think on her feet.

ViKtim seemed more helpless in the situation than depressed--I could tell she felt stuck. I secretly thought maybe ViKtim was querulous and paranoid for nothing--certainly MiNarc would never stray from ViKtim, they had always seemed the perfect couple to me. At that time, there was no hard-proof to stain my high opinions of MiNarc. Aside from that, even if MiNarc WAS cheating (which I doubted) she would be much too shrewd to leave hard-evidence. As a matter of fact, ViKtim and MiNarc's association was so close they had been known to exclude everyone else.

As we were drinking, ViKtim's lamenting disappeared and she appeared to be gearing up for a confrontation. We heard the car and saw the variegated colors of the yard illuminated by MiNarc's headlights just before ten (an hour past their regular bed time). ViKtim dumped the remainder of her wine on the lawn and told me to hide my glass to avoid bringing up bygone fights between her and MiNarc about the drinking. Even without evidence, I was willing to bet MiNarc was intelligent enough to figure out some drinking had more than likely taken place.

I simply remained at the table, politely observing--this was not the first time I had hung out with ViKtim and/or MiNarc and I didn't really think anything serious would happen. I also did not feel intrusive, because one I lived there, two, ViKtim had invited me outside, and three, I had supreme confidence it was just a silly misunderstanding that would be sorted out quickly.

When MiNarc came around the corner, stepping into the yard, I saw her looking nervous and shifty, something I had never observed from her in all the seven years I had known her professionally and personally. MiNarc, always tastefully dressed, was wearing her normal type of clothes: khaki pants, some sort of blouse or button-down, and probably a vest-jacket or something like that. She was also chewing gum--something I had never seen my uptight boss do before. When MiNarc saw ViKtim and me sitting in the yard she visibly startled and glanced around nervously, eager to deflect the inevitable questioning. Her body language alone was enough to besmirch the perfect standing she had achieved in my mind.

I thought she would address me, usually being proper but my boss and friend ignored me almost completely. She said, "I didn't expect to see anyone" or something to that effect, hollow because she was surprised, not because she felt guilty. It made me feel awkward to view my boss this way and I suddenly felt inappropriate (and meddlesome) for taking in this highly personal spectacle between a married couple--but it was too late, I couldn't just get up and go inside at that point.

When ViKtim asked where MiNarc had been for so long, MiNarc twitched nervously and evaded the question by saying, "Getting my hair cut." The plain hair was an instant tip-off to the truth of MiNarc's excuse. That moment was the turning point that tarnished her image for me. Since the hair looked no different then it had that morning, ViKtim looked doubtful about the illusory story and asked what had been done to the hair.

MiNarc's eyes flickered over the yard, to the door, to ViKtim's face, then mine, and she looked especially displeased that I was witnessing this stigma. I was definitely unwanted at that moment--I was stuck and riveted to the scene unfolding though. Looking wholly uncomfortable, eyes darting about as if to find some route of escape, MiNarc repelled the question with, (and this is a direct quote), "I got my bangs trimmed." Other than that MiNiarc chose not to embellish the preposterous story further. Immediately and entirely, my boss and mentor's former image was defiled.

She recovered somewhat and attempted to ward-off ViKtim's accusing stare and tried to stride quickly inside the Cabin-Mansion. Except ViKtim placed herself between MiNarc and the door, feeling no acquiescence or sorrow for her wife's unease. ViKtim was cloying, but it was obvious she was on the offensive when she said, "Come closer and let me get a look at your new hair." I could see MiNarc stiffen, all alliance between her and ViKtim vanished for the moment, as ViKtim went to touch MiNarc's unchanged hair. I assume, MiNarc didn't want ViKtim to see details of the hair, because it would disprove MiNarc's misleading tale and (in MiNarc's mind) sully ViKtim's image of her as a faithful and loyal wife. It was no secret that all three of us knew that MiNarc's story was tainted with deception. With brusque motion, MiNarc all but ran inside the kitchen door, too taken aback to even offer me a courteous hello or any acknowledgement. My being there had been officious to her, now she wanted me to leave more than she had before.