Kit10Phish Explains It All: Staining the Gazebo [5. Narcissistic Supply Transcends Sexuality]

Go back and read episodes one and two if you missed the beginning of this story:

After what seemed like hours, I was finally finished painting the upper beams just out of my reach, the intricate crossed wood, and the hard-to-get-to crevices of the gazebo. All I had left was the floor. I hunkered down to my hands and knees to stain the bottom of the gazebo. MiNarc was telling me about her past relationships (with men), a very familiar topic. I had heard about the men MiNarc had dated in her youth dozens of times. She told these stories to everyone as a sort of decoy--to make sure the public knew she dated men, so they didn't come to the conclusion that she's a lesbian. What was unfamiliar was how MiNarc said she preferred sleeping with women over men.

Sometimes for narcs, narcissistic supply can almost transcend sexuality.

I don't think it's a tactic every narc uses, but it's really messed up and is a whole other level of garbage human. As individuals, narcs have no sense of self and also get supply from sex, so I don't think they discriminate who it is with and they are incredibly insecure. Kind of a perfect storm.

She claimed she was bi-sexual, but told me not to tell ViKtim she had said this. I asked why in the world MiNarc would chose a harder life if she in fact did like men equally well. MiNarc said the sex with women was preferable. She continued, "They can't help it." Meaning the quick intercourse men are infamous for. Crawling on my hands and knees, with more than half the floor left to stain, I said, "If I had the choice to live an easy, heterosexual life, I would do it." It was difficult for me to believe that homophobic MiNarc really HAD chosen to marry a women over any relationship with a man. MiNarc passionately stuck to her claim that she was bisexual and lesbianism was a choice, but said, "Don't tell ViKtim I said that--she doesn't like that kind of talk."

Here are two quotes from two books on the subject of toxic cluster Bs:

"She will have affairs with both men and women. A psychopath will use the term “bisexual” or “lesbian” and such nomenclatures that give her a socially accepted identity, but this is not the underlying root cause for their behavior. The real reason is that all psychopaths are gender fluid; they lack a gender identity. What’s important to them is the intoxication of power from conquering other human beings, regardless of the target’s gender.” “By her very nature, she feels utterly compelled to ensure that her well of supply at any given time never runs dry and so she’ll basically fuck anything."